Running Gun

Well... something walked in on a business meeting yesterday and caused a quite a ruckus. It was a horrible interruption, and it got quite messy. Story time!

It was about 11 o' clock, and I had a lunch date with a client. Italian cuisine, if you were wondering. She was a shifty character, always on the edge of her seat and always antsy to pull a trigger. I smirked while I was watching her from across the restaurant, she wasn't very good at concealing herself in a crowd if that was her intention. It was blatantly obvious she was what I like to call a Running Gun. She kept scratching her lower back, fidgeting against her seat. Something was rubbing against her uncomfortably, and my guess was that it was a concealed weapon of some kind, most likely the 9mm that she possessed illegally. Her eyes were red, she wasn't sleeping well. Nightmares. Hehe. My previous research also showed that she has had quite a history with drug abuse and car theft. Escaping terror by getting high is the oldest trick in the book and if you wanna survive as a Runner, knowing how to hot-wire a car is the first thing you learn.

If only she had managed to contact a Librarian, she probably could have saved herself a lot of trouble. Librarian's are good at keeping things quiet. Hehe too bad, four years of running and she never found a Librarian to erase her past and now its caught up to her.

Jack, is that your name? Jackie Jack McJack. Hehe no wait, I think its John. Josh! That's it. Ha! That's your name. I think. I still have your gun! Hehe if Shady wasn't so protective, I would offer to meet you again sometime to return it... Hoho, I'm sure you'd like it back. It's been very helpful to me, I hope you understand that.

Anyways, back to the story. I had Jack's gun in my jacket (Ha! Jack, Jacket. Life is funny like that), but I really only carried that thing for show. Shooting someone is no fun, its too easy and too quick. It sure does stop someone in their tracks, though, when you whip out a shiny black pistol and point it in their direction. Hehe.

Would I use Jack's little toy today? I decided not to. No painting a picture with a gunshot today. The girl, she called herself Ashley. That's what the others said, at least. The other runners, I mean. They all had such beautiful singing voices. Ashley Smith, though, is not really Ashley Smith at all. That would be ridiculous. You wouldn't believe how many "Smiths" I have met in my lifetime. Smiths and Johnsons everywhere, but not a drop to drink!

So there I was, across the "mood-lit" restaurant, watching the Ashley Smith who is not actually Ashley Smith, admiring her flawed facade and then it hit me. My brain exploded with a whole new concept, and I felt inspiration and affirmation flood my mind. Theories bubbled up like boiling water and I stood from my seat, heading to the men's room to prepare, wearing a smile.

My mask slipped onto my face, attaching itself like a symbiotic life-form. My satchel hugged me, and smiled. I heard it sing in eager anticipation, stomach full of goodies. It sang a new song, I suppose it was as inspired as I was. I heard a toilet flush behind me, I turned, a man began to open the stall door and let out what would have been a profanity if I had not kicked the door into him. He fell backwards, landing on his throne and I descended upon him with a giggle. I pressed him against the seat, my hand around his neck. He thrashed, swinging at me. It was pathetic. He never landed a blow. I pulled a syringe from my bag, jousting with the long point. His voice died, his throat swelled. He still breathed, but his panicked grunts were silent.

"Hush," I said. "Today is your lucky day." His body went limp, he stopped resisting. He lacked the energy to fight, his arms were jelly, his legs numb. His breathing calmed. His eyes remained wide and terror-filled.

Inside my head, I was dancing. Ha, what fun. I pulled a nail-file from my pocket, stroking his cheek. "Open wide." His head lolled back, and his mouth swung open wide involuntarily. "Let's check those pearly whites."

Oh, yes, you didn't know I was a dentist? Its really just another hobby of mine.

I pulled out a long and thin knife, which barely fit between the man's teeth. I made small incisions, gently slicing is gums. Time to try a new creation! Hehe I always feel bubbly at times like these, so you can imagine my excitement as I pulled out the Joy Jelly Serum I had concocted earlier this month. I squeezed a tiny pea-sized portion of the thick substance onto a travel-sized toothbrush I kept with me (Not for myself, of course!) and brushed the congealed potion against his teeth. The man's eyes sprang to life again, thrashing in his head. They rolled back and I could feel his tensing vocal chords against my palm as he tried to scream.

I bet it felt wonderful. I moved on to the next step, applying the file to his teeth. I've never sculpted before, but there is a first time for everything! Hehe. If only I had had time to interview him on how the process made him feel... Halfway through filing I realized the time and had to cut my procedure short. I carved my signature into his tongue with my special oral knife and patted him on the cheek. His legs moved as mobility returned to him slowly, but I quickly administered chloroform to the patient and stuck another large syringe into his neck. Standing up, I dusted myself off and cleaned my tools in the sink before leaving. It was of no consequence to me if anyone found the unconscious man in the bathroom stall, and the men's room was unusually inactive today.

Perhaps the Boss is looking out for me, eh? Hehehehe.

So, I returned to the dining area of the restaurant and noticed that Ms. Smith was packing up to leave. Not a single person had noticed my ominous presence, so I decided to lean against a wall and watch her for a few more seconds. Heh, she stood and I noticed the black hilt of a handgun sticking out of her pants. Predictable.

Her blonde hair was a mess. I mean, messier. Ha!

She started to leave. I followed her out. Once outside, she turned a street corner. I followed her. She turned into an alley. I laughed out loud, and gave myself a wide bearing as I turned down the street. John's gun was in my hand, safety clicking off.

What a beautiful trick, Ms. Smith. In another life, you might have been a passable actress.

She was waiting for me, she had her own weapon drawn, and she was pointing it menacingly at my head. I instinctively raised my free hand and shadows whipped around my wrist. She dropped her gun and screamed. I was within range of grabbing her now. I slapped her across the face with the butt of John's pistol. She fell against the wall of the alley, I kneed her in the face. She scrambled to her feet, I kicked her pistol away from us, she pulled a knife out of her pocket. A switchblade. Really? Ha!

She stabbed at me, I caught her by the wrist and broke it. I pulled her by the hand to my left, and then swung her to my right again. Feel the burn, Ashley. She was caught off guard by my speed, I grabbed her by the shoulder and pulled her into my uppercut. She fell onto her back, I sat with my knees on her arms.

"We all have our tricks, don't we?" I giggled, "Four years surviving on the same con, eh?  I'm surprised nobody has caught on before." She tried to bite me, I reached into my satchel and pulled a syringe free.

"Not very conversational, eh?" I patted her face, "Don't worry, I'll be quick. Now," I pulled a camcorder from my bag, "Ms. Ashley the Actress, its time for your Internet debut!" I pressed record and sunk the needle's tip into her neck. Then it happened. I saw her eyes jump to something behind me. I looked over my shoulder and something tall and... skinny... And naked. Or at least, half-naked. It was covered in bandages like a mummy, but there were plenty of exposed areas. Its arms and legs were very long, bent and twisted.... It looked like a messier, sloppier interpretation of the Tall Man. Like, a Tall Man made out of distorted clay... naked, and covered in bandages instead of a suit. And it had a face. It had eyes, and a wide grin. The mouth was sown up like a doll, and all over its body were scratches like tally marks... I was half disgusted and half entranced by the morbid beauty of it.

My instinctual reaction was to assume that it was the Tall Man, or something like the Tall Man... But it was much different then the Slender Man. It just stood there for a second, long enough for me to notice it, and then it was gone. Its feet (Without toes and thin) never moved though, it just floated away as if it was riding an unseen skateboard or something.

Here is the really frustrating part. I was distracted long enough for the freaking Running Gun to wiggle a hand free and grab something from her pocket. A vial of something acidic, she spilled the contents all over me, burning my face and mask... The pain was a minor irritation, but then she ran away before I could pull Josh's gun loose to shoot her in the foot or something...

Now I have to locate freaking "Ashley Smith" again, draw her out AGAIN, and explain to the Boss why I failed to kill the stupid little brat. Worst of all, I have no clue what that other thing was that decided to interrupt me today. Just another thing to worry about. Oh, and the head rushes are still bothering me.

At least I got to test the Joy Jelly. That was the highlight of the day. I wonder if the patient has committed suicide yet. The chemicals I injected into him after knocking him out with the chloroform have probably set in... Hmm. Excuse me while I do a follow-up on this subject and/or vent my frustration. Hehehehe.

Until I update again,
~tA

Back in Black

Blood. Ha. Hahaha... My blood. Shiny new tricks everywhere, new blood. New blood. My blood. Haha. What a head-rush.

Hey kids, students, lovers, victims, pawns, and amigos. It has been a long time, hasn't it? A month without contact with my beloved readers... hehe I bet you're wondering where or why I went away. But wait-- If you've been keeping up with my darling Shady, you probably know that I called her. Silly girl always blabs on and on about me. She's such a fangirl. Hehehehe... But yes, I called her and up until now I have been quite busy with appointments and other fascinating little side jobs. This is the first time in a LONG time I've had internet connection to update from. I'm currently brewing myself a nice cup of tea, and I must say its splendid to be stationed again.

Travelling is fun, but nothing beats settling into a hideout and stalking one target for a few weeks... Teasing the sanity of a doomed patient, hanging a puppet by his strings... The fear breeds and infects everyone and then you reap the harvest.

I was never very good at farming, though... Soil is good for one thing and one thing alone, really. Decomposition.

What a head-rush. I keep getting them. Hehe guess it has something to do with my blood, doesn't it? Bloody blood blood. Black like burnt wood... Changing. I'm not sure who to blame for this new color scheme, but hey; nothing like learning  new tricks.

Speaking of new tricks, there are a few I'm excited to show off. Oh pshaw, shut your mouth, boy. Enough talk, more action. Why am I talking to myself? Heh. Too much time alone. Need some more social activity, or I'll snap. I'll have to get myself a dose of Dia, Shady and... Hehe Mr. Black. Ironic, isn't it? Black blood, Black's blood. Almost prophetic. Prophetic. Is that even the right word? Hehehe do I feel another head-rush coming on, or is this just a strong cup of tea?

Anyways, I'm not back in good old Jersey yet, but I will be posting from my new outpost while I clear things up where I'm at. When I do get myself back to the east coast, I've got to schedule an appointment with dear old Proctor.

Do that, do this, schedule that, kill him, mutilate her, what's up with everyone trying to boss me around lately? Sheesh. Its a good thing I love my job.

Another head-rush. Man, my eyes hurt... Itchy... Ugh. This is a bad way to start the week. No calling in sick for me, I have lots to do. I'm going to take a sample of my new blood and run some tests, I'm very interested in seeing what happens. Hehehe. I'm my own test subject! Funny...

Oh my head. I bet you're all enjoying my suffering, aren't you? Sick little monsters. Hehehe.

Well, I better scoot! If I don't get to work now, I'll never finish. Be back soon to update once my head clears.

Its good to be back.
~tA

Party Potion

Surprises are the best. Cliffhangers are pretty fun too. Leaving someone hanging on the edge of their seat, wondering what will happen next... Hehe almost as fun as planning the surprise in the first place. Do you like surprises? 

Hehe good news! I've selected the names for three of my latest projects: "Venus", "The Water of Life", oh and my favorite "Party Potion". Fun with chemicals, kids! 

Now that you know what I've listed them as, you can try and guess as to what these wonderful little mixtures do and then when the big premiere show comes around we can all watch and see what happens. Who knows, I may be just as surprised as you are ;) Hehehe.

Oh so many things to discuss. Where to begin... 

Paper. I have lots of it. What's special about paper you say? Hehe not the paper itself but what is written on the paper. Expect casualties in Jersey, dear readers! Hehe I'm trying to decide if I should do things alphabetically or just... you know... random selection. I'll flip a coin on it later. 

How was everyone's Valentines Day? Steal any hearts? Dissect anything? Hehe I had an interesting day. Climbed some trees, took some high quality photographs from a distance... The usual. I almost visited my darling Shady, in fact I was dressed for the occasion in my sharpest tuxedo, but while I was sauntering through the woods, the boss popped out of nowhere. It was bit frustrating, to be honest. What a way to kill my plans for the evening. I headed home, sat down, and started writing. I jotted down at least ten pages worth of names and locations. Apparently, I'm back on the clock.

Technically, I was never off the clock... I was just sitting around, playing with the available toys in my corner of the world, waiting for the big guy to give me a target. Working with The Executor was my last official assignment, or at least that is the last one that comes to mind, and since then I've basically just been shooting from the hip. I wonder why tall and lanky seems so interested in keeping me busy... Very curious. Hehe

Speaking of cats, DoctorProctor's curious case has reached a whole new level of weird. I find it hysterical. When I heard the news, I nearly died laughing... Hehe all this strange "Spirit-body-exchange-body-spirit" crap is really not my forte. Thuggly tried explaining it to me and its really very boring. Too many words, far too superstitious... I'm sure Mystery would be very interested in the situation, if she wasn't off on some wild chase to find The Executor. The little witch and I never did have the pleasure of meeting one another. Hehehe I'll have to change that...

Would you like that, Shady? Would you like it if I found your insignificant runaway friend and had her for tea? Hehehe. Oh I wonder how my chemicals would react to her. What blood type is she? Just wondering.

Oh, and Dia, if you're reading this... Hi there. ;) Knock knock?

I've been formulating wonderful plans for Joshua's gun, in fact I was just practicing my quick draw earlier. I am surprisingly good at it. Odd, I don't enjoy guns very much... Hehehe but they sure do look great.  

Hmmm... let me think... What am I forgetting... It was important.

Gingerbread cookies. Now I remember. I've got to keep deep tissue massages in mind. 

I'll make another update sometime soon. I'll be watching the Fright Night footage tonight. Fun fun fun! Anyone want to share some popcorn ;)?

~tA 

  

A Spoon Full Of Sedatives Helps The Gunman Go Down

Oh my little students... guess what...

Hehehe I got myself a free gun! But wait-- Not only was it free, but its also the property of an annoying little boy who tried to kill my darling Shady. Oh the things that I can do with this pretty little thing... Not like I couldn't have gotten a gun on my own, but this is a special little beauty. Snerk snerk, maybe I'll have some fun with it. How would you feel about that Shady? How would Joshy-boy feel about it ;)?

Speaking of Shady... It breaks my heart to hear about all the crap you're dealing with, it really does. And right before Valentines Day too! However, I'm very proud of you for finally making the right decisions. When you kill lovely Lenore, can I have the body? Or wait-- Maybe you could record yourself smashing her skull in when you do it. Could be a wonderful Valentine's gift

If you're in the market for sweets, I prefer dark chocolate. Red roses, with plenty of thorns. Do you like roses? Hehehe no, I think I have something in mind you'll like more... If you're not feeling well, maybe you can convince Brood to let me visit you for a little dinner date sometime. I'm sure, in your current condition, you could convince him with a few crocodile tears. Just kidding, I would never ask you to degrade yourself like that. Hehe if he won't let me visit you, I'll simply have to kill a few more people to convince him. What chemical weapon should I use first? Hehehe...

Oh wait, let's pause. That reminds me!

Are you refrigerating those chemicals I gave you baby? The consequences for letting them spoil will be...  very very scented. I would tell you more but you know how I feel about spoilers.

On another topic, there's a new blogger on the block who goes by the name of Frank. I like this kid a lot actually, reading his blog reminds why I enjoy what I do so much... In fact, it inspired me to get out of the house and do some work around town. More details on that later!

I've had quite a month indeed. I saved the damsel in distress from getting shot, finished the cast list for my play, made some very important calls, took pictures of a cat, started working on my latest project (Inspired by Dia, of all people) and well... just had a lot of clean wholesome fun, y'know?

Am I the only one who finds it repulsing how dull this planet is some days? Humankind has lost its vision. Nowadays, only the truly refined can admire the beauty of what I do.

But that's what you're here for, right? You want me to teach you how to admire the masterpiece that is murder. Oh, and I shall... Hehehe I shall indeed.

That's why I made this blog, isn't it? To bring you into the future. It's inevitable.

First, I'll change Shady. Then, I'll change the world... and then I'll tap dance my way across the world, pouring acid on the faces of anyone who resists.

Oh well look at me, thinking big. Hehehe that's not even the biggest part of my plan though, I can't spill all the tricks. That would be silly. There's quite a few surprises in store for all of you, and until I start really working... well until I start really working, I'll do whatever jobs the big man gives me. No runner is safe, you know?

Did I mention that list I found that I had misplaced so long ago? I can't recall...

BRILLIANT. What's brilliant? I can't remember. But I will, and that's brilliant as well. Hehehe I always remember eventually.

Dark poetry. Oh the teenage years. Why do I have so much of this stuff? Haha I was sick even as an adolescent. Adorable.

The dreams are back. Weird dreams. I blame him. The big guy. Man, I can't keep my mind on one topic at a time can I? Pity I haven't finished my Fright Night recollections... Tsk tsk, get your head on straight, boy-o... Hahaha because my head needs to be straightened out, right ;)?

I'll make sure to finish that as soon as possible. I just don't have enough time to go over the footage and refresh my memory, but as soon as I finish the meat I already have on my plate I'll be sure to check it out. It'll be so much fun :3 Like a trip down memory lane.

Memory lane is quite gory... Hehehe

Gosh look at the time, look at the time. I wish I could chat for a little longer but there are things to do and basements to bloody. I'll update you again soon. Very soon, hopefully. :)

Ciao amici,
~tA

Kidney Pie

It's what's for dinner! Oh, no not my dinner. Some family out in Nebraska. They wanted their beloved pet Rufus returned and, you know me, I'm a sucker for a "Long lost, now reunited" story. So, they got a treasured family pet and a delicious meal all in one! Sounds like a good deal to me!

Hmm, I'm not a big fan of cannibalism but I can't help wonder... How's your kidney taste, Shady? ;)

To be honest, it was a little hard to let go of dearest Rufus. He was nearly the perfect specimen to use for testing my new recipe for genetic mutation. Unfortunately, he couldn't handle the first phase of the experiment and, to be blunt, exploded into many tiny pieces all over my basement. Looked a lot like confetti, but definitely did not smell like confetti. I had a moment of nostalgia as it reminded me of Fright Night. Remind me to include a room next year full of exploding domestic animals. That'll give PETA a kick! Hehehe. But wait, I lost my point. It was hard to let go of the little beast's remains simply for the fact that his reaction to the chemicals was so extreme, I almost wish I had kept them for study. I did the nice thing though and returned him to his family :)

Reunited and it feels so good.

Speaking of Fright Night, I've decided to drag the story out as long as possible, by request of darling Dia ;)

I have 5 minutes before -- NO SPOILERS --  is finished baking, so if I include part 3 of the events at Fright Night or not in this update will depend on if I can finish writing before I run out of time. Just know that the story will be sectioned off into several parts, some longer than others.

I bet you're curious to what it is I've been up to since my last post was made. Well, besides reading up on some blogs and chasing down a few old...umm... projects, I've been throwing around some chemicals, practicing medical procedures, sharpening some knives and perfecting my aim with a dart gun. What can I say, I have a lot to prepare for.

For some reason, my computer keeps freezing up, so I think that is a sign that I need to get back to work. Sigh. I'm in a surprisingly bad mood suddenly. I guess I'll have to go burn something down, I need a pick me up.

Great, and now the sudden headaches... What's that smell? Is that... cinnamon? Hehehehe. Can you smell that? Maybe not yet, but maybe you will ;)

I'll be back. Oh yes. I'll be back. Talk to you soon.
~tA

Special People

Hello again, kiddies. We've been very busy bees over here at Advocate Industries (We do what we do, because we can) since the last post was made. It seems that I'm not the only scissor cutting strings, though, and not all of my co-workers are exactly working for the same goal as I am...

Hey though, at least in the end I can look back and be proud of the art I've produced, and if any schmuck gets in the way of my masterpiece... well, I think the Boss will let me have my fun. He always has ;D

What was my point though? Never mind, let's jump to the next topic.

Cats. I love them personally. They're great companions, and always feel up to volunteering for my projects. BUT not only do they have fun personalities, they also have wonderful claws. Quite fun at parties. Dogs are nice too, but for different reasons. Cats though... they just have it all figured out.

As for black cats... well, I have one in mind that needs to be dealt with.

Shady, Shady, Shady... If only you and I could have another extended vacation together... So much to talk about.

Thuggee says hi, by the way. I know that he and I have had our differences, considering how he threw you around last year... but he's tolerable as a business partner.

He's a nut... a complete nut. Saner than I am, though. Maybe completely sane. That is what is weird... He gets inside your head, too. Like the Boss, but without the headaches.

Of course, I don't have a death wish (sometimes), so I'm keeping my distance from him. Associating with him doesn't exactly draw friendly attention. Even the big guy hates him. Executor and him have some kind of war going on...

I'm special though. I can cross the battlefield without having to worry about getting shot. Even Shady won't kill me.

Oh but look at me, rambling again. I lost my point... Cats... No, that's not what I wanted to talk about...

What would you do if you woke up one morning and found that everything you believed was a lie? Hehehe... Now I sound like Doc Proc.

Topic: The Fright Night. Now here's something that I can focus on. Part 2: Sexy times beneath the Gallow's tree ;)

Ms. Lady's party experience began in The Office, a blank white room modeled after a familiar Asylum. By her account on her blog, she cannot help but admit that I have a great sense of humor. Love you too babe. Too bad you stuck around for a tad too long and had to suffer the penalty for lingering in that room...

Bygones, I suppose. If you've read anyone's retelling of my party before, you'll know that I just can't resist chattering on the loud speaker. So I did. Maybe I monologue a bit, but I don't think anyone was complaining by the end of the night.

It didn't take long for Shady to get distracted by the next room. She crossed the New Jersey Times room, examining its newspaper covered walls, interested, but once again I had to usher her along to the next room. If I hadn't been working on a schedule, I would've allowed her to bask in the documented glory... Hehehe I would have let you all linger and enjoy my Themed Rooms.

She moved on to the next room. The Happy House. One of my favorite rooms... Previous volunteers who either succeeded or failed my tests, packed into cages and left to burn with the rest of the mansion. Do you lament that they could not be saved, Shady? Part of me would have liked to keep them for further examination... but there is only so much you can do with a broken mind.

This room is where Dia and Shady bumped into each other for a bit. Boring, in my opinion. May as well have been a knitting club encounter. Would've been quite a show if they had lingered 12 more seconds. That's live television for you.

The two little girls skipped off together into a dark room, and you already know how Monsieur Ferus handled things... Hehe so exciting.

Seperated, Shady ran off to the School House to meet with dearest Josie and Dia... well, Dia learned not to trust strangers.

Jeez, I really did teach some life lessons that night... To me, its all a bit blurry. I may be mixing the order of events up, I can't quite recall, but I think the memories I created will linger for a long, long time. Maybe forever.

I guess we'll see. I've been at this computer all day playing with coding, and writing emails to send to far off individuals, and I'm getting bored, so I'll hop along again soon to write up the next part of my retelling.

Hehe see you soon ;)
~tA

Cleaning House

Time to get down to business.

Oh yes. Business. Hehe let's all put on our ties and jackets and get to work, shall we?

Where to begin, where to begin... Oh, here's an idea: Fright Night.

Has it really been so long? November seems so far away... But oh, I won't forget that glorious explosion. I think the girls thought it was pretty sexy ;)

Propane, like a boss. I guess you could say that Fright Night ended with a bang. But enough with the puns! Are my ears still ringing?

Memories... THAT is how you make a memory. You take a common cliche and you make it special. How'd you enjoy my finale, girls and boys?

Have you been eagerly anticipating this update? I'm sure you have. Why else would you be here if you didn't adore my stories? Hehehe...

Let's discuss cleaning. Cleaning what you say? Cleaning house. Most people use Windex, I prefer to use fire. Everything burns. Propane just adds to the fun!

The party started off swimmingly. Josie was there. She's a doll. Hehehe. Shady attended, though I doubt she really had any other choice. ;) She can't stay away from my body. I work out. I remember seeing Ferus, he's a fun guy. Fawkes... Hehehe I can't say his name with a straight face. And he kinda talks funny too. Graves and Gallows, the inseparable pair, showed up and were quite the party animals. I think Gallows and I could be very very good friends... And lets not forget everyone's favorite; Dia!

Do I spy a double date between Shady and I with Gallows and Dia in the future?

We're all so cute together <3

I can't wait for Valentines Day... Hehehe

Anyways, enough about love.

Things started out with Dia showing up a tad bit too early and entering the warehouse using the key I had supplied her with. She ended up entering my TV Tunnel, a special themed room elaborately designed of a bunch of TV's that are playing a multitude of wonderful videos that I've created over the course of my long career. Some were animations depicting the imaginary deaths of a few of my visiting guests, some were videos of me torturing past victims, and some were of my guests going about their every day lives while I observed them from a distance... Most of said stalking footage was of Shady, but whose keeping track?

She got fixated on that stupid room and started wasting my time, so I shut the TV's off and opened the automated exit door that would lead her into the next room. A shame, she got the message before I had to "encourage" her to move on. Hehehe. When I was a kid I did Boy Scouts for a short time, so it wasn't hard to remember the importance of being prepared. Oh the good old boring days of my youth. Beforehand, I had installed "encouragement" systems in every part of the warehouse maze for guests that lingered too long in one room.

Oh, and by the way, snails are trending.

All of my observation was done from the security room attached to the maintenance hall located near the back of the warehouse, locked down so no kiddies would accidentally stumble in upon me and ruin my fun. Occasionally I would use my nifty little ladder to ascend the catwalk above the warehouse and observe the party goers more intimately. Silly little Narnians.

What was I saying? Oh, snakes! Right. Both dearest Dia and Fawkes were weaving their ways through the maze now, very close to encountering each other. I was on the edge of my seat every time they crossed a common intersection, but sadly this isn't reality TV so nothing too dramatic happened with these two. Though, I was simply delighted by Ferus' performance in the Black Chamber. Sneaky little creep with his cigars (Or was it a cigarette? I can't remember which it was) and machetes. Oh Ferus, tobacco can kill you... Hehehe

What does any of this have to do with snakes? Well, it so happens that I designed a very special room for Dia with a very moody snake I like to call the Grinch. It's a shame she fled the room as soon as the Grinch retreated behind some brush, I would have loved to see her reaction to the "encouragement" system. Fawkesy's reaction to my snake was less entertaining, to say the least. Poor timing on the Grinch's part, I think. Stupid PMSing snake.

Gallows and Graves, well they were an inseparable pair as always. By the time these two were actively participating in the festivities, I had already started dissecting a dismembered arm from a few projects ago. I recall looking up from my work, noticing Gallows and Dia in the Mannequin House and becoming mildly interested in their relationship...

Compared to Gallows, I might as well be the Love Doctor and have a Ph.D. in romance. But despite his social awkwardness, I have no doubt that he knows how to get a girls heart, though ;)

If you didn't catch the joke, you should take a bath in gasoline while holding a lit match.

Oh crap, that reminds me. I have to go start a fire...

I guess I've ran out of time for today kids, I'll be back later to post the rest of this update.

See you later!
~tA